i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
