i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize