Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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