Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
high people should be assigned attendants
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
