the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
