Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
