Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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