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  I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.

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• You need either a nurse or a milkmaid for rehabilitation.

  Submitted by porksword on Feb 4, 12 at 12:42pm

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• He needs a dick splint, stat!!

  Submitted by judyfinkel89 on Feb 4, 12 at 3:51pm

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• Rub some Ben-G@y on it and keep it elevated

  Submitted by UniqueNordic on Feb 5, 12 at 6:50am

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• I swear I've seen this or one like it before on this site

  Submitted by tlovell on Feb 4, 12 at 1:16pm

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• DAMMIT, Jim...I'm a Doctor, not a carpenter...I can't fix wood

  Submitted by SnidelyKWhiplash on Feb 5, 12 at 2:31pm

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• Stop having sex on a trampoline

  Submitted by artard on Feb 4, 12 at 11:43am

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• They can't cure herpes either

  Submitted by mthib on Feb 4, 12 at 11:33am

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• Just rub it out. You'll be fine

  Submitted by B1gBadB1lly on Feb 4, 12 at 1:49pm

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• Told ya! Naked wrestling is is bed sport only! Fucking on a couch is annoying anyway. Upolstry fabric carpet burn hurts.

  Submitted by GA_Peach on Feb 5, 12 at 5:18am

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