Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Randomize
