She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
