Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Last time i carry you out of a forest
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
