everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Sober January is a disaster.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Semen is not good for contacts.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
