I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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