I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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