these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
