You're so nebulous sometimes
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
