I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Randomize
