Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
