"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
