looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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