You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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