note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
