Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
