Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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