the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
