is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
