i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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