I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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