Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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