some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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