And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize