So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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