ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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