i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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