Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
