we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
