I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
we're so committed to being not committed
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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