whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Just pee around me
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize