so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
