Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize
