So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
