people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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