you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize