ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Randomize
