Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
a search helicopter?!
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
