Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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