Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
