Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
wanna go halves on a baby?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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