you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
