Whod you bang
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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