Who did Billy Mays play for?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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